Tales from the Single Side part III...

...What A Girl Wants (feel free to teach your young boy children this!)

I read this article today, titled 'What Women Want From Men'. I'll give you the Cliff Notes version.

Women evidently want:
1. "Return Her Messages"
2. "Kiss Her for No reason"
3. "Dance With Her"
4. "Dress Up for Her"
5. "Remember Random Milestones"
6. "Take on an Activity With Her"
7. Propose a Visit to Her Family"
8. "It's the Little Things..."

I don't even know where to start with this! Maybe I am not the type "woman" this article is written about or maybe everybody is right (hold all comments similar to this though...because I will fight you on it!) and I am TOO PICKY (NO SUCH THING, but I guess that is just an opinion- even if it is RIGHT!) but these seem RIDICULOUS!

"Return her messages"??? If he has to be told this, odds are he has OTHER things he needs to learn before getting to "what a woman wants", you know like, "how to be a decent grown up human"

"Kiss her for no reason" Um, what are actual reasons TO kiss someone? And would you want to be with someone who has to be told TO kiss you?? Don't you want to be with someone that WANTS TO KISS you? Or is that just another CRAZY thing I want??

I do like "dress up for her" I know this is possibly crazy because I don't love to dress up and I am not asking for a guy to buy a tux and wear it everyday but I LIKE to see a suit on Sundays and I think dress pants and a button down shirt looks really nice on most guys. I can go with this one.

"Remember random milestones" and "take up an activity with her" are kind of to each their own. I kind of would like a guy to remember little details, not because it's what I want, but because it's important to him. And, I love the theatre, ballet, and the planetarium. Odds are, most guys won't love any of these but I don't want to drag him there. Just every once in a blue moon I would like him to take to one because he loves me and the world can every once in a blue moon just revolve around me. Again, I don't feel like he should have to read this in some article, I feel like he should want to make me happy every once in a blue moon. Crazy me with the high standards.

"Propose a visit to her family" bothers me the most. The article goes on to say that do this "even if you're not particularly fond of her busybody mother and father, suggesting a visit (EVEN JUST A YEARLY ONE)"... Are there women who really are willing to settle for this? I mean are there women who love their families who are willing to settle for this??? Good grief! I mean, even with all of their faults, if you can't love my family, there are too many things wrong with you to even warrant a second date! Second, a man has been hitting up that crazy crack pipe too much if he thinks I am visiting my family only once a year! Who does that? I can't even discuss this anymore without raising my blood pressure!

THESE are the things THIS woman wants in a man:

1. A Godly, Christian man who will help lead me to Heaven.

2. Someone who makes me laugh!! A lot!!

3. Someone who loves my family (and, really how could you not?)

4. A real man! Not someone scared of bugs or cats or that spends more time getting ready in the mornings than I do.

5. Someone who doesn't like to fight but won't let me run over them.

6. Someone who likes sports (and VERY PREFERABLY NOT an Alabama or Florida fan!)

7. Someone taller than me (I totally realize how petty this is...)

8. Someone bigger than me. (I don't even feel like I have to explain this one)

heartbreak

I had a real funny post to post today about something that I had read but then I was given some news that lead me in another direction.

I realized something today about heartbreak. It is almost always accompanied by shock. Think about it. Someone dies and the timing of it often shocks you. Someone in your family or circle of friends gets diagnosed with a serious disease and you are so shocked. Someone cheats on you or breaks up with or leaves you and you never would have believed it. Why is this? Why aren't we better prepared for heartbreaking things? OR why do the people we expect least hurt us the most? These are not questions I expect to be answered and I hope that you aren't looking for answers further down in this blog because I honestly don't know one besides to blame Satan.

Most of you who know me know that I have had my heart broken more than once by a boy. A couple of times left the most lasting scars though and these were the times that, still to this day, I have a hard time believing that they did the things they did. I can honestly say, I never saw either one coming. I am still in shock over those and, goodness knows, they have been a minute ago. In those cases, the shock has gone on much longer than the heartbreak did.

When mom had the stroke, I was first shocked and then the heartbreak set in. It was (and STILL IS) shocking to think of a perfectly healthy 45 year old who has never spent a non-chilbirthing day in a hospital as able to have a debilitating stroke. How could you NOT be shocked to see your perfectly-healthy-the-last-time-you-saw-her-mom suddenly laid up in the icu unit of a hospital unable to even speak or walk??? Who even had time to be heartbroken at first, shock consumed so much?!?!?!

Today I found out some very disturbing (seems inappropriate it so understates how I feel) news about some friends of mine. They evidently have had an affair. I just COULD NOT be anymore shocked!!! And there had even been rumors before and I STILL couldn't be more shocked. I would have put this man in the top of the Godly men I know. Such an evangelist!! And, she....I mean, not her! I just can not believe it. Neither one of them. I can't believe they would risk their a) SOULS, b)families, c)jobs/livelihoods, d)SO MANY strong friendships, d)their reputations- NO ONE had a better reputation throughout their respective brotherhood or community than these two! I just can't fathom it. To say I am in shock right now is the biggest understatement ever.

There really is no point to this blog besides for me to ramble "out loud" and to ask you all to please pray for these two people, their families, the Godly work they have been so involved in, and all who were hurt by them.

Fun weekend! Lokking forward to a fun week!

me and Ash at her going away luncheon on Friday. (note to self: find a better picture of self and Ashley!!!)

This weekend has been so fun! On Saturday I got up and went shopping with Leigh and Nathan and then we went out to eat at The Street cafe (YUM!) with Ashley and some of her friends. Ashley has been the best friend that wasn't bound to me by blood the past few years. She was the trainer for Faulkner football and the only girl to keep me sane in this office full of boys! She decided a while back that in order to fulfill her goal of being a full time missionary that she was going to need to go back to school to get her nursing degree. She then figured out that the only way to get that done was to do away with (as much as possible) all living/boarding expenses. So, the decision was made that she would "retire" from athletic training (and obviously Faulkner) and move back home to Indiana where there was a softball coaching position waiting on her and she could live at home for free. Then, she will begin nursing school full time. I am so amazed by her all the time but this is just one more amazing thing! I cannot imagine voluntarily turning my entire life upside down and not knowing really what the future holds! She is such an inspiration to me and, although I wish her the very best, I am just going to miss her like crazy (and probably go crazy since they are replacing her with ANOTHER boy!!!) The dinner was really fun but, obviously, very bittersweet. After dinner, we went home and got our guest bedroom put up and got the Christmas stuff at least moved into the guest bedroom. Next stop, all the way to it's rightful spot in the laundry room!! :)

After work Sunday morning I came home and got ready real quick and then went to Krispy Kreme and bought two dozen doughnuts. I was real early and went into our classroom and set up a coffee pot, and a water boiler, alone with some tea bags, hot chocolate packets, cups, sugar, creamer, etc. with Nathan's help. We just got a new Bible class teacher for the young professionals class at University and since then our class size has jumped from about twenty to about thirty-five! The teacher is Matt Vega from Jones School of Law and if you are in the area, I HAVE to suggest you come! You will see why our class is growing so! Since we have been having so many visitors and because we have just talked about it for so long, I just went out and purchased a cheap coffee pot and stuff so we could have it in that class room. Funny thing! I don't drink coffee and had NO idea how to make it! Obviously, everything but how many scoops to put in is pretty simple. Let's just say, 14 scoops is BY FAR too many! That coffee looked like syrup! HA!

Sunday for lunch Louise and Dirt, Michelle, Justin and Morgan, and Nathan all came over for lunch. We had chicken casserole, cheese potatoes, peas, mac and cheese, and rolls with homemade oreo ice cream for dessert! It was great food and even better company! After all but Nathan left we went were SO SO SO EXCITED for the USA vs Canada Olympic gold hockey game! I got dressed in red, white, and blue and we settled in, ready to celebrate! If you watched you know that at about 4:40p.m. CST, with about 24 seconds left in the game THE UNITED STATES SCORED TO TIE IT UP!!!!!!!! AWESOME! EXCEPT, University's church service starts at 5:00p.m.!!!!!!! After MUCH debate on whether to follow on our cell phones (we had the nursery!) or to avoid all contact with the outside world and watch it on tivo after services, we decided to do the latter! Let's just say, as much as we loved the nursery AND two of our favorite people were in there (Kensley and Morgan!) it was still a VERY LONG hour! But, at last we ran out and headed for home with Kensley, Jenn, and Fipps in tow! Fipps (Corey) is our Offensive Coordinator and we just LOVE that family! They have recently started coming to University regularly and we are just LOVING IT! They came over and watched the end of the game and the closing ceremonies with us! We were really bummed that we lost but a fun night was still had by all!

Needless to say, that after being up for 29ish hours I was pretty tired but I got started watching the new show, 'Marriage Ref' that came on after the closing ceremonies and IT OWNED ME! SO FUNNY and DEFINITELY making it to the regular scheduled programming for our house! While I am on the subjects of TV shows and fun things this week, I am SO, SO SUPER EXCITED about Jim and Pam having their baby this week!!!! (I know, I know, they are just TV characters but I just LOVE them!)

Late last night my parents made it in and they will be here all week along with NaNa and PaPa! I JUST LOVE Lectureship time! We are all about to go to lunch and then I am making dinner at my house tonight before class. After class, another coach, Chad and his girlfriend Macey are coming over to have a little Bachelor finale party! YAY! The rest of the week will be filled with regular old work and school but with all my family here to make it so much better! I am so excited and I hope that you all have as great a week as I am planning!

picture of the day!

I stole this picture from Michelle's blog from when they went to the zoo. (In case you missed it, that's Louise and a STORK! Come on, HOW GREAT is that?????)

One of those days...

...ever had one? You know, where every slow drive gets in front of you and you seriously consider the literal cost of just ramming their car with yours? Or where you just want to comment on every single person's status that reads (something like) "I just love my wonderful life, my wonderful kids, my wonderful husband...even my poop is wonderful, everything is just perfect!!!", and say, "Really? No one's buying it and you sound like you are just trying to convince yourself and it really annoys the rest of us to have to read your stupid status everyday." OR (along the same lines) want to just delete those who's statuses make you want to slit your wrist everyday or think that they are thinking about it everyday! Or you try to catch up on your tivo a little and the stupidity of The Bachelor (which is OBVIOUSLY NOT new to this episode) makes you want to throw your shoe at the TV? OK, maybe you haven't exactly but you know! So, in honor of this and because I am having a major pity party for myself today, I am going to list some of the things I am perturbed about and counter it with things I am happy about. For my own mental health. Read on if you'd like but PLEASE save your "it could be worse" comments. I OBVIOUSLY know this.

1. I hate this city. I was going to list all of the things I hate about it but it is much easier to just list the things I love and DON'T hate about it. I love Faulkner, University CoC, the fact that three of my cousins live close, and that I get to see my sisters everyday!

2. I hate this weather. There is NOTHING I like about cold weather. It makes my hair bad, skin bad, makes my shoulder and knee hurt almost constantly, I STAY cold, and I stay in layers so I feel free to eat all I want and gain weight. Plus, this year God decided, evidently, to REALLY mess with all the "global warming" people out there and has added in snow, which is a 911 dispatchers NIGHTMARE!

3. We are in a book club with the church and are currently reading Francine River's Redeeming Love and I have always heard how wonderful it is and I think it's awful! I mean, I get the story and all but real life is horrible, WHY would I want to spend my very precious free time reading about more horrible? Maybe it's because I see the crappy side of the world a lot more than most people because of work but I want to read happy stories where people fall in love, endure through hard time and come out better people, and that END HAPPY!

4. The Bachelor. I know, I have total control over recording and watching this stupid show but it always brings me back in like the proverbial "bad wreck on the side of the road" I just CAN'T believe that there are women who are SO INCREDIBLY STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Actually, I guess the thing that really bothers me, is that I DO BELIEVE IT and it irritates me SO MUCH!!!!! Stupid, stupid, stupid! I WOULD LOVE to be a contestant on this show and him try to pull some of this stuff over on me OR have FIVE MINUTES with these girls to talk some sense in to them!!!!

5. I know I have harped on this too much and I do believe that God has a plan for keeping me here even over my persistent prayers other wise but, I HATE MY JOB!!!!!! I distinctly remember saying that I loved my job (LONG ago!) but, for the life of me, I CANNOT remember WHY I would have said such a thing!!!! I hate the STUPID callers (which IS 90% of them) about their STUPID (NOT 911 WORTHY) problems (that they usually have brought on themselves!) I despise some of my bosses, I think the entire place is run like crap and that Braden (who is one month old) could make better decisions and run the place better! I hate the uniforms and I feel like hate isn't a strong enough word for how I feel about working night shift. I hate how it makes me feel, hate how it makes me look, and I HATE missing out on SO much! I even HATE the uniforms!!!!

OK, now things I am happy about:

1. I AM GOING TO BE AN AUNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING BAD can compare to the happiness THIS brings me!!!!!!!

2. I am SO grateful to have A job with good insurance and able to pay all of my bills every single month!

3. I got to go to my first ever Lady Vols game at Thompson-Boling arena in Knoxville!!!! It was definitely something that was on my "bucket list" and it was SO FUN!!!! I have yet to visit Knoxville when I wouldn't describe it as one of the best times of my life!

4. I love my Faulkner football family! I love the coaches, players, and Ashley! They ALWAYS make me feel better, no matter how crummy my night was! And, they can always be counted on to MAKE ME LAUGH!

5. I love that I was raised to have a real relationship with God! I ALWAYS feel like He is REALLY with me, I often find myself talking to Him like He is sitting beside me! Because of this, I know that of all the crummy feelings and bad days I have and will have in the future, the one thing I don't ever have to contend with is loneliness. I am SO grateful for this!


Hope you all are having a better day than I am and, don't worry, I am going to bed soon and will wake up in a better mood!

Tales from the single side....Part 2

I think I am going to title this second installment, "Things NOT to Say to Single People (that have actually been said to me!!!!)



1. "You need to move to where all the good, single, Christian men are!" (Is there a range somewhere that I can sit up in a tree stand of sorts and shoot them down as they run by????? And if there is, would I want to pick up my entire life to up and move there just to do that????)


2. (A conversation someone was having with me and my sister) Leigh: "I love him! He is only 31, I don't think that is too old for me." Person X: "You have to wonder about someone though that is 30 and not married. I mean, what is wrong with them that they aren't married already if they are that wonderful?" Me: "Really??"


3. "How is it that someone like you are still single?"

4. And along the same lines, "WHY are you STILL single?"

5. (talking about a guy that I have made the point that I am not interested in) "Can you really afford to be that picky anymore?"

6. (at my little sister's wedding) "You better hurry up or both of your younger sisters will be married and you won't be. You don't want that do you?" (dead serious)

7. "Isn't it time to start compromising?"

8. "You do like boys, don't you?"

9. "Maybe you should think more about the way you dress and do something with your hair and make-up. That would help."

10. And my personal favorite: "Isn't your biological clock starting to tick pretty loudly? You know women have a lot of problems getting pregnant after thirty."


Do you really need any commentary from me on this?

The Start of Another Generation!!!

So....I know most of you know the news already but, that's not stopping me from blogging about it!

Mom and Dad came in on Sunday afternoon. I had worked all night Saturday night, came home, took a shower and got ready for church service, went to morning service, and then got lunch with Louise (while Dirt went hunting). After lunch Louise went with me to a 31 party. If any of you haven't been to one (***shameless plug***you should! www.mythirtyone.com/laurie31 :^) we always start the party by doing a "Celebrate, Encourage, and Reward" introduction game. During this game, everyone introduces themselves, and then they say something from their life that they are celebrating, then they say something encouraging to the hostess, and then I reward them with something. Well, I always go first and then I go to whichever sister is there helping me. Obviously, this time it was Louise. She said that the thing in her life that she was celebrating was me getting in A in Statistics (which, believe me, IS worth celebrating!).

Mom and Dad got in town during the party and my Dad dropped my Mom off at the party. We all left straight from there and met Dad, Dirt, Leigh, and Nathan at pm church service. Mom and Dad were down to celebrate Louise's birthday (which was 1/15) so we all went to Jason's Deli from supper with some friends and then went back to Louise's house. After our friends left Louise's, I announced that I was leaving to go home (if you are keeping up here, I have now been up over 24 hours straight). Louise stood up and told me to wait that she wanted to show us all the latest project she had been working on and went to the back.

She came back in and gave me, Leigh, and Mom& Dad all cards. No one thought this out of the ordinary because Louise is always making cards. Cards for family, cards for friends, cards for the sick, cards for prisoners, etc. You can look at the cards above. They were super cute and she came up with them all by herself! I read the card out loud and look up and started asking who these were for and Mom and Leigh jumped up screaming. Then it hit me. Life had just changed for all of us. Kind of a huge moment! I am so super excited, Leigh is so super excited, Louise and Dirt are obviously excited, but my Mom and Dad can't hardly contain themselves! If you aren't their facebook friend, you are REALLY missing out! :)

One day, if the baby ever decides to read this, the rest of the post is from him/her.

Dear My First Niece or Nephew,

I wish that I was eloquent enough with words to put into words how I am feeling right now. The news of your impending birth has been the happiest thing that has happened to this family in a very long time. That is really saying a lot because, as you probably know by now, really happy things happen in this family all the time! Here are a few things to help you navigate your way through this family, that maybe you haven't figured out just yet.

First, we'll start with your Aunt Leigh Leigh. Leigh Leigh is probably your best bet to being "the cool kid", especially if you turn out to be a girl. She is going to be the one who tells you all about the best make up and hair products and the best clothes to wear. This advise will probably differ from your mom's and I, and will probably make your dad cringe (because, inevitably, will be the most expensive make up, hair products, and clothes!), but it will probably be most in line with whatever the fashion guru's of the day are saying. You will always be able to go to her and tell her anything without fear of any judgement. However, take my advise, this is the family member you do not want to cross. Boy or girl, she will chew you up and spit you out. She will love you through it all but, you do not want to learn this for yourself! You will be just like the rest of us and always be glad to have her and will find out that her light shines brightest when you need her.

Next, your Grandma (I know that's not what you are calling her but as of this date, she hasn't picked out her name yet!). Wow. Pretty special lady, huh? Have you ever met someone with a better heart than her? My guess is that she has probably driven you crazy once or twice already but that you also have already learned that she is your biggest fan! Funny thing, she was ALWAYS mine, your Mom's, and Aunt Leigh's biggest fan! There is definitely no way that you could have scored a better Grandma. I know this without ever seeing her in Grandma form because I know for a fact that we couldn't have scored a better Mom. What a lucky kid to get a bake cookies whenever you come to visit, drive hours to cheer on your every game, send presents for every good grade, best hug giver kind of Grandma! Don't ever take this lady for granted, you have no idea how close you came to never knowing her.

I think your Grandpa (the name thing goes here too!) is close to my favorite person ever. I believe that he has been a blessing to SO many over the years and we all have known how great he is with kids. There is no doubt in my mind that he is one of your favorite people ever too. No kid has ever NOT loved him! His biggest fault is that he is always stretched too thin. He tries to give everything to everybody and I have a hunch that, once you get here, he may get a little more focused. He has the special ability to make everybody feel like they are the most important person. The cool thing for you, is that you really will be. Also, if you are a boy (or a girl who loves sports!) he will be your golden ticket! He has played and coached almost every sport and will love nothing more than teaching you! I am sure he is already dreaming about it and planning it!

That brings us to your dad. Your dad has become such an important part of this family that it is hard for me to remember a time before him. I am so glad my sister got a Godly, Christian husband and I am so glad that you got such a Godly, Christian dad. Boy or girl, I can't wait to see the first camos he buys you! The great thing about having him as a dad is that you get so much knowledge about so much! He studies the Bible and will all be there to answer any questions and discuss that will you. He knows so much about guns, hunting, fishing, etc! He and your other Grandpa will definitely be the experts to turn to for those things! Not a lot of experience on this side of the family! He also is SO smart! I know you will always have someone to help you through school because he has helped me so much! There is no doubt in my mind that he will be such a great dad because he has been such a great husband to your mom, such a great brother to us, and such a great son to your other grandparents! They are such great people and did such a good job with him, that he definitely learned well!

I think that leaves us with your mom. You really, really hit the Mom lottery with yours. There has never been a kid that has met your mom that didn't love her. For that matter, I don't think there has ever been ANYONE that has met your mom that didn't love her. We have always picked on her, calling her "the perfect sister" but the truth is she is about as close as they come. Your mom has the biggest heart of anyone I know and does more good than anyone else I know. Even though she is my little sister, I have always looked up to her. I know she is my sister and I love her more than life itself so that takes a little away from this admission, but I honestly think I would believe it even if we weren't related. I don't think that if you could choose from all the women that have ever lived or will ever live who would be your Mom that you could do any better. She is the most Godly woman I have ever known and I pray that you realize what a blessing she is. My mom (your Grandma) was the best, most Godly mom ever and I took her for granted and then almost lost her. If you learn anything from me, I hope that it is not just about Tennessee athletics, family history, or sarcasm, I hope that it is NOT to make the same mistake I did. Don't ever take your mom for granted. I know she is all you have ever known, but she really is the best.

In closing, know that we, along with your great grandparents, great aunts and uncles, and cousins all already love you and have been praying for you since before we knew anything about you. I am sure that by now we are great friends and I think you hung the moon but, I know from experience, there is something great about knowing that people, not only will always be there for you no matter what, but have loved you and have been praying for you since before you were even born! Knowing what you are made of, I know you are the greatest kid ever and even though I haven't met you yet, and in fact only found out about you earlier this week, thanks for coming in and making the greatest family ever even better. I definitely love you kid!